From scientific observations to common sense rules: how children who go to bed early in the evening sleep better… and longer!
Almost every time I ask parents to put their children to bed very early in the evening (between 7 p.m. and 8 p.m.), they promptly ask me:
“Isn’t it better to put him to bed later? At least he’ll wake up later?”
“Are you sure she won’t wake up at 5 o’clock in the morning?”
The answer to the first question is: no, he won’t wake up later. Most likely he will wake up at the usual time, if not earlier!
The answer to the second question is also negative. Far from it! Instead, we will create the basis for her to wake up later!
What science suggests
I would like to refer you to a good article (taken from a scientific study) on the correlation between early bedtime and longer nights for babies.
During the study (here the link to the article*), researchers analysed the sleeping habits of 24 infants. The needed to follow two simple recommendations: follow a solid pre-bedtime routine and put them down at an appropriate time to promote a longer night’s sleep.
Using actigraphs they then examined how routine and bedtime could be associated with total duration of nighttime sleep at 6, 15 and 24 weeks of age.
As the children got older, sleep onset was earlier and bedtime routines became shorter (p’s < 0.05). Infants fell asleep between 7 and 8 p.m. in 24% of nights. Furthermore, infants with a solid routine and who were not fed to sleep had good sleep averages as early as 6 weeks, which gradually improved over the following weeks.
The researchers concluded that babies who fell asleep earlier also slept longer at night. So keeping babies awake longer in the hope that they will wake up later can be counterproductive.
The common sense
Even without bringing up specific studies, sometimes we can simply stop and look at our babies and try to identify when we should put them down. I am talking about the famous wakeful windows: a very young child is physiologically unable to stay awake for too long.
His body starts to secrete melatonin naturally after a certain period of wakefulness (depending on his age, he will be able to stay awake for two, three or four hours in the afternoon).
Going beyond that limit will mean losing the benefits of melatonin, which will be replaced by cortisol, also known as the stress hormone, which will not allow him to go to sleep peacefully and have a good night’s sleep.
Putting a child to bed at 9:00 or 10:00 pm is equivalent to telling an adult to go to bed every night after midnight. This might be possible at first.
With the time, a lot of tiredness would start to accumulate, with the effects we can imagine: irritability, hyperactivity, lack of appetite, big attachement to the parents (not really the pleasant part of the attachement…)
To convince you, I can also tell you that sleep is more restorative during the first part of the night. Putting your children to bed earlier gives them more quality sleep, creating the conditions for a more restful second part of the night.
They will then be able to fall back asleep in the early hours of the morning, with a definitive awakening after 6 o’clock.
The importance of the COUPLE
Finally, I always like to point out to the parents that putting children to bed early in the evening means that the couple will have more quality time. Imagine having time together after a tiring day of work, childcare and housework.
Being able to have a quiet dinner together, watch a film or simply have a chat about the day. You will also go to bed feeling good, sleep better, wake up the next morning with new energy and the desire to do lots of nice things for yourself and your family!
These steps are not very easy for all families. Sometimes you need help, specialised advice (you can look at my services). Before moving on to this, however, you need to be super aligned.
My initial advice is to have a good “family meeting”, during which the couple faces up to their weaknesses and needs and decides what to do. After that, you can focus on action.
Always remember that everything we do with our children needs a solid foundation: the foundation is the agreement within the parental couple. Agreement is followed by help, serenity and the energy to change things!
